How to Overcome the All-or-Nothing Mindset

There’s a particular mindset that will always prevent you from reaching your goals if you don’t take care of it. I’m talking about the all-or-nothing mindset.

The diet industry has trained us to think we have to be perfect in order to make changes. But what happens when we think this way? 

We never make changes because, well, I don’t know about you, but I’m not perfect. 

A mentality that keeps you stuck: the all-or-nothing mindset

Diets have set us all up for failure. Because you’re either “on a diet” (and making progress) or off a diet. And while you’re on your diet you have to be perfect or you’ve failed.

But guess what: there’s a better way!

This way of thinking is sabotaging your health and ultimately preventing you from reaching your goals. So, to help you overcome the all-or-nothing mindset, you need to think differently. 

And today, I’m going to show you how.

Overcoming the all-or-nothing mindset

According to Aristotle, the Greek philosopher, "the whole is greater than the sum of its parts". It’s an idea that’s been applied to the concept of holism. 

The concept explains that a group of interacting things is better when used together than separated into its individual components.

This idea applies perfectly to your day. A day is composed of 24 hours and 3 meals. So, if you mess up at one point you have another chance to succeed in the next. Practically speaking, if you eat an unhealthy lunch, follow it up with a healthier dinner.

A day is not lost just because you “slipped up” at one point. The only way a day is completely lost is if you throw the whole day away because of one slip up. That is the definition of an all-or-nothing mindset.

The problem with an all-or-nothing mindset is that it works in extremes: either big wins or big losses. But we want to celebrate the big wins as well as the small ones. Because small wins add up to big ones. 

When we work in extremes, we set ourselves up for frequent disappointment. And this is the problem with diets: either you’re all in or you’re failing. It’s terrible for your health and your mental state because it sets you up for failure. When you’re sticking to your diet you’re proud of yourself. But the moment you indulge or slip, you feel bad and come down on yourself.

A new mindset

If you want to change it starts right now by thinking differently about your health. No one is perfect! What’s different from those who are making progress is that they don’t have this mindset and they don’t give up when their nutrition doesn’t go perfectly. 

Three steps to overcoming the all-or-nothing mindset

Instead of telling you to just think differently, I want to give you three steps to help you overcome the all-or-nothing mindset.

1. Admit you’re not perfect

You’re not perfect and expecting perfection of yourself is neither realistic nor possible long-term. I know you know that in your head, but that’s what you’re expecting of yourself when you start a diet.

Instead of expecting perfection from yourself, realize you will slip up. But understand those slip-ups are part of your progress.

“But how?” you might be asking.

Melissa used to have the all-or-nothing mindset. She thought she had to cross every “T” and dot every “I.” But then I gave her the tools and showed her how to use them. Soon after she understood how to overcome this mindset she had this to say:

“Kara has given me tools to explore food and my overall diet. The bonus (and let’s be honest a goal of mine) is that through the process I’ve lost 10 lbs so far without having to follow everything to a T. Giving myself grace is part of the process and the reason I’ve been successful thus far.”

– Melissa McGinnis

2. Understand your day is not the sum of its parts

Just because you fail at one point in your day doesn’t mean the entire day is lost. This is the inaccurate concept the diet industry wants you to believe. They want you to believe that if you fail you have to start over. Why? Because then you continue returning to diet over and over again.

Understanding a “slip-up” somewhere along the course of your day is what will allow you to succeed long-term. In fact, that’s called healthy nutrition.

3. Give yourself some grace

Like Melissa, you need to give yourself grace. Realize it’s part of the process or strategy you have in place.

But in order for this to be an effective step, you need to have a strategy in place. Otherwise your grace will become an excuse for not making progress.

 
 

Overcome the all-or-nothing mindset

So, let’s get away from the all-or-nothing mindset.

No matter where you’re at in the day, “all is not lost” – choose to make the next meal or snack healthy and continue on your day.

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